There will be a point in your mommy life that a 10 minute shower will be a luxury. You'll throw your 18 month old in bed, prop your 3 year old that thinks she's a teenager in front of Liv and Maddie with a yogurt and plot your escape. You'll gather necessities, pour a glass of wine and tell your toddler mommy needs a shower, not to move and come get her if it's an emergency. You'll be singing John Mayer to the top of your lungs and your hair will be at full slather when you hear the urgent wails..."Mom! I need to poop."
So you hop out of the shower remembering your daughter is in full ballerina mode and can't possibly de-tutu fast enough. You will remove slippers, tights, and tutus and place her on the potty in which she replies the urge has left her.
You tell her to keep trying and reassure her Mommy is there and hop back in the shower. You haven't got the shampoo rinsed out before your princess proclaims "I did it! All finished!"
You hop back out of the shower ever so gracefully because the tiles are soaking wet and offer to ballerin-ifa your daughter once again. While in the process she'll repulsively say "Ewwww! You're getting me all wet! Take it off!" "Dry my dress now!" In which you'll sigh, swig a drink of your wine and think quickly of a compromise.
Being the brilliant, seasoned mom you are you begin to barter. "Tell you what Carsyn", you say. "If you let Mommy finish showering she'll pour you a big bowl of Cheerios!" (Important tidbit- kids love Cheerios. I pack them everywhere. They make really big messes. Which is why kids probably like them). She mulls it over as I stand shivering. "Ok!"she resigns, "Put my blue Cinderella panties on, get my blue tutu, and find my lip gloss."
Oh mom. You were outwitted again.
But you don't give up.
You scramble and do all those things, naked, sopping wet, and sudsy headed. Mentally high fiving yourself for locating the lip gloss under the sofa you return to shower...
And it's like a blast from the Rockies.
In a feeble attempt to avoid being frozen solid you quickly rinse, dry and reach to take one more sip when you here it...
I spilled Cheerios!!
Come clean me up!!!
I'm waiting on the steps.
Oh, my darling ballerina. Good thing you're cute.
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